It’s funny to me that I usually make posts like this after I’ve gone to a vineyard. You may remember this post about embracing my post grad stage of life. Well I have returned to good ol’ Big Cork Vineyards for a get together with the girls for my friend Jess’s birthday. And lets be honest, anyone can turn into a great philosopher when girl talk and wine are involved. But honestly, I first started thinking about this blog post over the holidays when I saw one of my friends from college after 6 months.
My friend had been home for the holidays and we were catching up about all of her cool new adventures in a new state and city, making new friends and going on dates. Later on we were texting and I told her “Girl you are doing your twenties right!” and she literally said “Dude I feel the same about you!” And that really struck me because in my eyes, our lives are totally different despite the fact we graduated together with the same degree.
So that got me thinking about all the different paths we all can take in our twenties. That also sparked a whole weekend of me talking to some of my best friends about life. I have a lot of girl friends I’m super close with and we’re all in twenties and every time we catch up and talk to each other, I’m just reminded of how much I love them and the fact that none of us have a clue as to what is going on.
I have friends that are working on their bachelor’s degrees. I have friends working their butts off at grad school. I have friends that didn’t finish college and jumped straight into the work force. I have friends who are living paycheck to paycheck in their own apartments. I have friends who still live with their parents. I have friends who moved super far away from home and totally out of their comfort zones. I have friends who just downloaded Bumble and are just trying to go on a single date. And I have friends who found their person and are engaged. (Yeah I know…I got a lot of friends) but you get my point! There’s not a single person I know who’s life is exactly the same. And what I’ve come to realize is that we are all happy and unhappy in our own way.
The person who jumped right into the work force may wish they had finished college, while the person who spent 4 years in college is dreading all the student debt they accumulated. The person who works 9-5 is tired of devoting the majority of their week to their job while the person who only works nights and weekends is tired of missing out on all the fun. The person with their dream job may hate the city they live in while the person jumping from job to job couldn’t imagine living anywhere else. The person with the awful roommates may miss living at home, while the person at home cannot wait to get out from under mom and dad’s thumb. The lonely person who hasn’t had a date in years is wishing they could skip ahead to when they have a sweetheart to come home to, while the person who has been with someone for the past 4 years is craving space. You always want what you can’t have, and our twenties are prime examples of wanting things that aren’t in the plan at the moment.
Maybe its just a side effect of being your twenties, but I feel like we’re just waiting for the next step when life is supposed to magically fall into place. I know I have a much different image of myself in my thirties than right now, and I’ll be damned if I haven’t progressed closer to that image in the next few years. I think one of the best parts of this time in our lives is not knowing how it is gonna be or what our future holds. It’s scary but its also super exciting. And all the older people around you probably reminisce about their younger years when they didn’t have a clue either and they figured it out! Whether it was a smooth or bumpy ride, we will all figure it out.
I am so convinced that God has a plan for everyone and in the grand span of life, you will understand every little thing once its all over and I’m writing about embracing your eighties.
So in conclusion, there is absolutely no right way to do your twenties. There is literally not a single “one size fits all” method I can tell you that will make your life perfect. Does that make this blog post clickbait? Possibly. But if there are any takeaways from this post it is this:
- Be as open as possible to everything. We don’t know what opportunities are going to come up so step out of your comfort zone and say “yes” to new things whenever you get the chance.
- Embrace where you are because you’ll never be living like this again. So if you can, travel to far places and stay up until 5 am with your roommates and go to that concert 3 states away and spend way too much money on brunch or go on a ton of really horrible dates. Your life is like this for a reason, whether you know that reason or not.
- HUSTLE! You gotta do whats best for you and your future! Don’t let anyone hold you back because this is the time you work hard to get to where you want to go.
- Don’t wish away this time. We get so caught up in planning and looking forward to the future that we forget to enjoy our time and the journey to where we want to go. One day you’re gonna miss it.
- Try not to judge other people who aren’t doing the same things you are. This is important and the main message I want everyone to take away from this post. No matter where your friends are in life or the people you knew from high school on Facebook, its important to not pass judgement on the people who are doing their twenties differently than you. We all have our own paths and we shouldn’t be shamed just because its against the status quo or not along the same timelines as others. This is vague, but I’m sure you understand what I mean.
So cheers to your twenties and here’s to hoping we all figure it out by our thirties. (And in case no one has told you this recently, you’re doing amazing sweetie).
Thanks for reading! xx