Would you even be surprised if I told you that the first thought I have when I see this quote is Taylor Swift? A few years back she wrote down a “daily reminders” list for this one fan to remember and some variation of this quote was at the top of the list. And not only is that great advice, but if Taylor Swift has to remind herself of that, you know its a real problem. I’m constantly on social media and I always find myself comparing what I’m doing or how I’m doing to the random strangers I follow. That being said, I wanted to share some thoughts on the subject.
To fully understand what I’m trying to convey here, let’s say you want to post a selfie on Instagram. You know how long it took to put your make-up on in the morning, how long it took you to pick out an outfit and how many times you had to take the picture before you found an angle you liked. And then after going through all of that and you share it with the world and then you see someone else post a picture that just seems so effortless. Like they’re totally perfect without even trying. I feel this way all the time mainly because I am almost always on social media trying to promote this little blog thing. It’s so easy to compare yourself to strangers on the internet because you literally have no clue how their life is beyond what they show you on that app. You only know your life and everything you did to try to give off the illusion everything is perfect and dandy.
Unless you have a Finsta or one of those self depreciating senses of humor that belongs on Twitter, social media is the place to show your highlight reel. I feel this not just as a blogger, but as a 20-something person. It’s very rare that someone blatantly says they just cried in their car or got yelled at at work or got ghosted by some guy or was reminded of some past trauma the other day at the mall that sent them into an emotional breakdown. Everyone has insecurities and private matters that stress them out and give them anxiety and make them feel awful. Yet not everyone is going to share that in a casual picture on Instagram. And when you’re scrolling through Instagram, you’re not thinking about all the things that person could have experienced behind that picture. You’re just taking it for face value.
I have friend who used to tell me “Kim you seem so put together and in control of your life”. And I laugh because there are so many things that I am unsure of and insecure about. But to me, not everyone needs to know all of that. I try to be as transparent as I can be on this blog and a part of that is admitting that I totally don’t have my sh*t together. But I also try to be as positive as I can be and share the things I want to share, including some pictures I really like of myself. Having a blog is a good way example of this quote because you don’t normally find me sharing the unflattering or embarrassing pictures of myself on here. Maybe I should do that more often just to completely erase the image of always being able to take blog-worthy perfect pictures. Trust me, I have a lot of derp pictures saved on my computer. But my whole point is, that I have days when I feel hideous and have a handful of ugly and “yikes” pictures mixed in with the ones I share on my blog: I’m just only going to show you what I want to show you.
What can I say? I’m an expressive person.
So even on days when you feel like you don’t have it together and everyone is doing a lot better than you, I hope you realize that there is probably someone out there looking at you like you have it all figured out! They’ll look at you like you’re the most successful, happy, content person in the world…if that’s how you try to show it. Even if it’s not true! If you’re feeling down on yourself and like everyone is doing better than you, 9 times out of 10, you’re wrong. You shouldn’t be comparing yourself to people on the internet because you have no idea what they’re going through on a daily basis or what it took to get that brief image you’ve stumbled upon while scrolling through a ton of other perfect pictures. Comparison is going to happen. I just hope you remember your “behind the scenes” is so incredibly different than anyone else’s “highlight reel”.
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Thanks for reading! xx